Bridging the Gap: Mastering Vendor-Client Dynamics

Kristina Stubblefield: [00:00:00] Welcome back to another episode of WedPro Business Solutions. The person sitting next to me probably looks very familiar. Over the past three weeks, we have been replaying when Brittany first sat down with me a few months ago. When she was deep into wedding planning and provided such amazing insight to share with wedding professionals. And now she's back. 

Brittany Murphy: I'm back. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Newly married. And I'll still say Brittany Murphy because she hasn't actually changed her name yet. But so smart why you haven't, and your new name is going to be... 

Brittany Murphy: The American way to say it will be Nagy. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Nagy, that's what I thought, but I wanted to make sure. As of now, Brittany Murphy at the time of this recording, but soon to be Brittany Nagy.

Thank you so much for coming back. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes, thank you for having me. 

Kristina Stubblefield: The date was June 3rd of 2023. And we are recording this the first part of August. 

Brittany Murphy: Oh [00:01:00] my God, two months. Exactly. 

Kristina Stubblefield: I was going to say two months, does it feel like it's been roughly eight weeks? 

Brittany Murphy: No, to be honest with you, I actually haven't changed my calendar from when I had all the stuff I had to do, like leading up to the wedding.

So I think I'm still on like the waiting. Luckily the reason I haven't changed my name, our honeymoon's in September. So I'm waiting to make sure I come back to America with all my passports in check before I make it. But yeah, I think I've been living in the, it feels like it was just three weeks ago type of situation.

But sadly it is August, which means it has been over 60 days. And yeah it's. It's extended itself, but I'm really excited for the honeymoon still so it feels like I'm still in that fun whirlwind wedding planning stage 

Kristina Stubblefield: and who knows how long that will last because, you planned for if I remember correctly, it was a little over a year.

Is that right? 

Brittany Murphy: Yep I felt like we got engaged January 3rd Okay, and then the following June of the next year was our wedding. 

Kristina Stubblefield: But I think you said to me you had gave yourself a couple months with the [00:02:00] engagement before you started. Do I remember that right? 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. So I probably enjoyed it until about March and then around the end of March, I started getting serious because everyone was freaking me out that all the good vendors will be taken. Stop just enjoying it and start planning it. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Yes. So I know we have a lot to cover and I purposely haven't really talked to you just briefly about the actual wedding day. Cause I wanted to hear it firsthand as we were recording Let's start off where we left off. You were in the midst of picking vendors.

You had made some decisions at the time. And we can go back and recap the amount of frustration that you had, especially being in marketing with not only finding options online, learning about them. But then there was a lot with communication with reaching out to people to set up meetings or get additional information or just to see could this be a possibility? And I know there was a lot of [00:03:00] frustration with that. 

Brittany Murphy: Oh yeah.

Kristina Stubblefield: I'm saying that probably very nicely. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes, I mean hindsight, I have relieved myself of all that anger and oppression that I came with or in those first few podcasts. But yeah, the main issues was it was hard to find people.

I was noticing that no one really had a good either social media presence or a website or just anywhere for me to get information without having to go through the sales process with them. Communication during the sales process was crazy that I was getting people not even messaging me back. They said they were open.

And then when I'd follow up, say, okay, What are your pricing? How can we figure out how to start this process with you? And they'll just go MIA, and also just the aspects of even when you would sit down and talk with a few people, sometimes it wasn't fully clear what they were going to provide for you.

And I was noticing the sales process and given I am in marketing, I am in sales and I'm not perfect, but I did notice during the sales times with certain people, they were asking questions to complete their sales process, but not actually get to know [00:04:00] me or my needs along the way to even figure out, am I a good fit for them as well?

Kristina Stubblefield: It almost seemed one way or the other. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Not a whole coming together. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. And given when we have our marketing meetings with clients, there's a good mix of questions on both sides, obviously we, as marketers need to get an understanding of exactly what you've done, where you're looking to go, and they should be asking us questions, how we're going to help them get there.

And so yeah, I felt when I was going through those conversations, it wasn't fully a two way road. And that was a little frustrating because when I would ask my questions, I felt as if they weren't really listening. So I think an example I gave was I said, me and my fiancee at that time, We hate line dance songs.

I was in middle school when the cha cha slide came out. If I hear the cha cha slide one more time, like my brain will explode. I've heard it way too much. It's just, it doesn't get me on the dance floor. And so I think with the group of friends we have in family, it's not really going to get them on the dance floor either.

And so I had some DJs when I had conversations say, okay, yep, we can definitely do that. And then I would ask later when I would ask my [00:05:00] questions, Hey what do you do to get the dance floor going? What's the thing you do? Line dance songs. And they smiled and stopped and that was it.

And I was like, okay, well, we just talked about how I don't want to utilize those. Would there be a backup game plan? And they said, Oh yeah, just the kind of blank stare on the eye was I wasn't fully listening or present for you. And I was this is a wrong impression. Like you're going to be here for me on our biggest day, make sure you have my back. 

Kristina Stubblefield: So here's what's going through my mind hearing you talk about this. I'm going to pay more attention when I meet with clients, I've done websites for, I don't even know how many years, honestly, I would say back to the AOL community, but most people have no idea what I mean.

That was before websites were actually websites, and it is something that we have done over and over and over again. And I wonder myself if, because I've done it so many times. Is there maybe things that, I don't want to say I assume, but I'm so comfortable with the [00:06:00] topic that maybe I don't clarify for someone that's starting a business or never had someone really work one on one with them.

Maybe they've used something where they've just submitted stuff and really haven't met, strategized, and executed with a person or a company before. So what just went through my mind is. That's something I've done over and over again. I probably need to be more aware just because I've been in that cycle so much.

And I wonder if the same thing for wedding professionals, because if you're a DJ photographer, officiant, you probably do it weekend and week out and have multiple meetings, but that person sitting in front of you. There could be their first time, most of the cases, it probably is, unless they've met with others, just makes me pause and think this could apply to anybody, but I could see where you're [00:07:00] going with that.

You're just in this hamster wheel. And for you, it's the same thing with just maybe a little bit different parts, but for the client or potential client. It's brand new. 

Brittany Murphy: And just to. Oh gosh. She's writing notes. I know. I have a really bad short term memory. Oh no. 

Kristina Stubblefield: She's writing notes. That means she's got something to say about 

Brittany Murphy: it.

Just to remind everybody again, so I do marketing more for like trade companies. So roofers, plumbers, electricians, those are my guys. I call them, if you got a butt crack, they're who I want to market for. So you say that and yes, I'm literally here thinking, oh shit I know I have done that. I know I have glossed over things or assumed that all of this is common knowledge because, I've done so many of them.

I get lost in it. I'm just talking to myself half the time you fill it. So it's where the thing I wrote down is during my sales process, something that I really want people to do because I have people all over the country is, I don't just want a phone call with you. I want a video call when we do our first strategy session together, because what I've noticed is if I can get them on [00:08:00] video It's almost as if I'm in person seeing them eye to eye and I can see the minute their face changes to deer in headlights. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Where you've lost them or they need more explanation, something.

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. And that's where, of some my vendors did do video calls with me and that kind of helped make it more personal. But that's where relaying that back, I would want to make sure that all wedding vendors moving forward, if you're not going to meet in person, you don't have to, I didn't find that necessary, but to make it a video.

So you can at least see the people, see what their reactions look like. So you can see are you getting them lost along the way? 

Kristina Stubblefield: It's more personable. You can relate better, and I know that people will sometimes say that they're over zoom or Google meet or this because they were forced to do it for X number of time during that certain time we had going on.

But all honesty, I think it's really helped people be better in person meetings now and or utilize video meetings, because what you just said there, and I think we can all take a [00:09:00] pause and review our own processes and how can we make them better. It's not to pick them apart. And one of the things that just popped in my mind is maybe you're someone that works a lot of times with friends.

I tend to become close with a lot of our clients, I'm fortunate to have some that I've worked with for my gosh, 20 years and I think maintaining structure during meetings and you can go in so many different directions. That brought me back to that is something that I've tried to be better about because I do work with quite a few people that are also friends is making sure that I'm not glossing over or going to skip this part, because its who they are. It's important to maintain all aspects of any type of project, contract, anything along the entire process. So I'm so glad you brought that up. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah, I think the whole [00:10:00] part of the sales is to make the client or potential client comfortable as possible. So if you're not answering their questions or getting to their level and making sure that they feel clear and confident with what might be happening, then you're never going to win the sale regardless of it.

And I really had some vendors that did above and beyond with that. And then I had some, as I said, the one, the DJs that were just like, yeah, line dances after I'd already talked five minutes of please, that's not what I would prefer anything else. 

Kristina Stubblefield: You didn't feel heard. 

Brittany Murphy: I felt exactly as if you've done this so many times, you're just hoping it's a numbers game.

And then I'm going to convert because you had something spectacular that was automatically going to convert me just because you're at a wedding show and I got your business card and I set up that meeting. It doesn't mean I'm actually booking you like we're interviewing. I'm seeing how you're going to be doing just like my clients are interviewing me.

Like they're talking to two or three marketers usually, and we know that they're switching business or switching companies are talking to two or three people. So you need to assume your brides or your grooms are also doing that as well with you. So if you're not making yourself shine in a way of, I really have your back.

I'm gonna do everything to make this stressful day as unstressful for you as possible.[00:11:00] Then you don't deserve them in my opinion. 

Kristina Stubblefield: You're right. And here's the big word that I've talked a lot about throughout several episodes is there's so much power in listening. You can learn so much, you can take away so much, but also for wedding professionals out there, you can actually hear what people are asking of you.

That's social media content. That's FAQs for your website because if one person is asking there's five others thinking the same thing, even if they're not reaching out. 

Brittany Murphy: Exactly. 

Kristina Stubblefield: The power of listening. So I'm gonna continue to listen. Awesome so Thank you so much for recapping that because that really was an important thing that you had talked about before so from your journey, did you deal with a lot of the same frustrations that you shared? Did those become easier after we talked? Dare I ask? 

Brittany Murphy: Yes, it did become easier. As I said, I've lost my aggression. I had during that planning process of it, once I was able to line [00:12:00] out my vendors and really honed in who it was, we've booked we're under contract, life got a lot easier for me. A lot of them, as I said, I picked them because they did a good job making me feel comfortable.

And then even after the point of setting up contract, I had good enough communication to not get fearful of, Hey, is this vendor still going to show up? Is everything's still lined up. I felt a lot more calm on that aspect of it. They were reaching out. So doing the good client process systems in a way.

So it's funny that yes, what we were kind of bitching about previously was awful processes before client, at least there's some processes in place after client. You can't get them to be a client if you don't have a good pre client experience. So those things do work together, but I had to do quite a bit of organization on my side.

There is obviously multiple payments for most people. They they either break it up at, six months out, 90 days out and so forth. So tracking that all fell on me. I really didn't have any vendors that would send reminders or anything. 

Kristina Stubblefield: And you did not have a wedding planner, right?

Brittany Murphy: [00:13:00] So I did not have a wedding planner until about 30 days out or 45 days out. I was just told by so many people that it got in my head and I caved in and I said, you know what? I do need someone. My husband was so nice. He was like, I'll run it. I'll prepare like you just get hair and makeup done. Like I'll get the decorations up I'll make sure vendors get here on time.

He's a project manager by trade. So he's like, this is my wheelhouse I have it and I had so much guilt because I said no this is your day as well. I want you enjoying this your friends are coming in from the country, you need to enjoy this time and be a groom just as much as I want to enjoy this with my friends and be a bride so I did cave in, I found a day of coordinator that could kind of come in and just hone in that side of it since I'd really done most of the back organization and planning so far of paid vendors.

Kristina Stubblefield: Really execute your vision and make sure the vendors you had showed up and things like that. And I'm sure that provided some type of peace of mind, at that point. 

Brittany Murphy: It did. And that's where I'm, I was very upset, people kept yelling at me to get one. And then after I got one and[00:14:00] as we'll learn how the day went, I'm so grateful I went ahead and did that. 

Kristina Stubblefield: It's your sidekick. It's about your back and to, and it's a filter. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. And most of my vendors said, they would pick up pieces. If I didn't have a coordinator, the photographer would help run the timeline to make sure things were there. So I knew people were willing to pick up, but I was just worried if I could not be totally present or if my husband could not be totally present. Someone could, and it wouldn't be either of our mothers. 

Kristina Stubblefield: It wasn't a dedicated person's job that day. So it ultimately would have fell on your all shoulders. But through the process with your vendors and things, you didn't have a full, like full service planner that was going to appointments or helping you with your timeline.

Of payments, meetings and things like that. So it fell on you to do that. And that's interesting about the reminders. Because there are some people that still don't embrace like a CRM or an all in one business system [00:15:00] where some of that people are scared of that term automation when it can be like an assistant for you, to take off that busy work.

But for you, that was a missing piece that could have been helpful. Those payment reminders or whatever was due. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. I had to create an Excel sheet, go through everyone's contracts, put in all the dates and what the amounts were due. So, yes, I did probably the stuff that an actual wedding planner would have done for me, but when I talked to most of my friends, none of them had a full service coordinator. Just having a day of coordinator was where most of my friends fall. So within that, I know all of them had, or had to deal with these timelines and that's when it gets to the end, it does get crazy.

Cause just making sure has everyone been paid? Have I give everybody their direction? Can I just relax and do this? 

Kristina Stubblefield: You're down to the wire. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. 

Kristina Stubblefield: The last 30 days there's only so much time. 

Brittany Murphy: There is, unfortunately. And that's where I feel that. Being a wedding vendor, if you can actually ask your clients this question, and hopefully probably most of you do, do you have a coordinator?

Are you going to have a day of coordinator? Knowing that aspect, because the [00:16:00] minute they say no, I know some of you are like, Oh crap. Now some of this falls on me potentially to run it. Like my photographer probably was like, Oh, okay. I'll rise to the occasion, but that's not. Totally the role I want to fill.

I want to be present and taking the photography, taking the videography, not watching my watch for you. 

Kristina Stubblefield: You want them to do what you hired them to do. That's a really interesting point. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. So if most of your brides and grooms are not working with a full wedding planner, then I can say, at least in my opinion, I would have only been gracious for someone to send me out an email invoice, reminding me in 10 business day or 10 business days in two weeks, your second invoice is due just as a reminder, because it's not rude. And I signed a contract with you. I know I'm supposed to be paying you and also it's your business. So you should be making sure that money's collected on time. Sure. You should not be worried about hopefully collecting those late fees. And that's the major portion you're getting business off of.

Kristina Stubblefield: One of the things that just popped in my mind, sorry not to interrupt, but did you get a checklist or here's what is needed from you as a client [00:17:00] from any vendors, Because I would assume that some of them, and we know that word, but I would assume that some of them needed information from you. A questionnaire filled out, a pre meeting, 60 days before your event. Did you get a questionnaire or? Or things like that from vendors. 

Brittany Murphy: So the day of coordinator did she, she knew that she needed to organize all the vendors, get all the contact information. And she was very active. She was very new in the business. So she was just starting this as a side hustle. And I think she's going to knock out of the park and be full time at this the way she's going.

She's doing everything we bitched about in those last three episodes, correctly. And she's brand new at this. So she must be listening to the podcast. She did, she asked everything to help herself get organized. My DJ was very good at just making sure, Hey, what songs we want for what? Just following up to make sure you had this.

He was even good at, there was a few songs we cut, just to make them appropriate, but also fun. So like best friend by 50 cent was our outro song. So as we kissed and walked out down the aisles, that [00:18:00] song played. And it's not one you can have your family listen to fully. But the beginning course is you're my best friend and it just says it over and over again.

So I had a few do very good at that. Really, I don't think so much that my food vendor or my photographer did as much on that side, but I don't think there was really as much as they needed to maybe collect on that side. But they did reach out. So I'm not saying they didn't it, but I think certain positions that you have, you really have to be more full force on it.

So if my DOC had not been as active as she was, I probably would stressed out 10 times more than thinking that was going to help you stressify me. 

Kristina Stubblefield: So just from hearing what you're saying, if you're a vendor, depending and what you're saying is depending on what type of vendor you are, if there are things.

Questions that you need answered of your clients and you need that 60 days out, 90 days out, six months out, whatever it is, you can actually use digital forms, where you can send that to them, they can fill it out [00:19:00] on their mobile phone or computer. However, they want to do it, which is most convenient for them, but that way you have those answers that you need leading up to the event, and it doesn't necessarily have to be a phone call or have to be a video meeting to, again, depends on who you are and what category you're in with your business. But that way, maybe there are questions that those answers pose for you. That gives you time to say, Hey, Brittany, I'd like to go over this time to schedule. So don't be hesitant to use digital forms, questionnaires, things like that. Because I think engaged couples or your clients would appreciate giving you that information because it would take some of the stress or possible lingering questions as someone that hasn't been through this. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. And to me. If my vendors had AU automated, every communication [00:20:00] they gave me after I signed up, I don't think I would be upset at all. The things I'm thinking of is, yeah, like they could have automated to ask for when guest count, so like the food vendor.

Kristina Stubblefield: Mm-hmm. 

Brittany Murphy: when guest count's due, sending it a week prior saying, Hey, we're gonna need this by Friday. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Mm-hmm. 

Brittany Murphy: They could've automated all of that. I would've, you would not have been offended. I would not have been offended. It would've been, thank you for reminding me. And one thing I just wrote down that I think I would've loved, because it's free 99 to set up in your automation, but what if every month you have set before their date, you have a countdown for 'em?

We're three months out to your wedding can't wait, two months out can't wait, 30 days out can't wait. And like obviously you can put first name, you can put all the Q codes in this for it to pre-populate all of my information. Congratulations, Brittany and Gabor, we're only 30 days away can't wait. These are all little things that it's not a reminder that I have something to do for you, but what it would relieve anxiety about is I'm still booked. They have not overbooked me. They are still top of mind, everything. I did have a vendor tell me that,[00:21:00] there was an accidental overbooking. Luckily it was not on my date, but the weekend, behind us, they had overbooked with someone. I won't say what vendor or even what industry they were in, but they told me that story. And that's where it came to my head. Okay. Well, automation wouldn't technically maybe 100% fix it up a double booking, but it could a, and B.

It would be very nice to know that, Hey, if I'm getting these email reminders that I'm in your system, I am booked for this day. Like it's somewhere it's tracked. So on your calendar, you know, this is Brittany and Gabor's day. Like you were here 100% to do this. And the reason I bring that up as well is even for my trades guys, if you set up like a roofing or a plumbing inspection, let's just say, like I'd sell my guys, if you can actually have that, like text confirmation, like after they book.

It gets a text confirmation like, Hey, this person's showing up on this day at this time. It just relieves a lot of stress on me because I know no matter who I talk to, no matter if they fat fingered it in the system. I'm in, I have a name of who's coming and I have an exact time. Like I'm all the confirmations to know the business is going to be running smoothly and I [00:22:00] can get back along and free my mind to more space to do other things versus making sure you're doing your role.

Kristina Stubblefield: Okay. You brought up 14 things, but in all honesty, it's so good to hear you say that number one, automation doesn't offend you. And I think that sometimes all of us, including wedding professionals have in the back of their mind, Oh, well, if they get a confirmation. One minute after they've sent this like they're going to know it's automated is that seem very personal and I've actually over the past few months I've been working with quite a few people you're in what you're talking about is touch points along the way That's what I call them Even though you may be the one making the cake and you don't really do anything with that couple Maybe you don't meet to 30 days before their event But they booked you 12 months before their event.

That doesn't mean you have to wait until 60 days to say, Hey, now's a good time to go ahead and be scheduling your 30 day out [00:23:00] appointment. Because this is what I've shared with people. If you stay as a business owner or as a business, if you stay top of mind, you probably have a better chance with referrals. And let's be honest in the wedding industry.

A lot of times, I was gonna say most of the times, a lot of times, you know someone else that has just gotten engaged, is engaged. It seems to always happen. If that cake person would have emailed you 11 months out, even though you already booked countdowns on, you know, less than a year. And you had dinner the next weekend with someone who knows someone that, Oh, you know what?

I decided to go with this bakery because this, and the next thing, well, maybe they don't have some, you just never know where that can lead. And that's the conversations I've been having with people. It seems that a lot of times vendors are getting booked eight months to 16 months out.

And I know that sounds like a big window, [00:24:00] but. Some of those people, if you're not a planner, I'll throw venue in there. Having those touch points along the way, just let you know, you're not a number. You are in their system. Even those automations, it makes you feel. Oh, okay. I'm still there. Oh, it's good to hear from them.

A lot of times people are like, yea, but they're already booked. Do they really want to hear from me? I don't have anything else to provide to them. And sometimes I feel like they're missing the whole point of just they're hearing from you. So to hear you say that you're not offended about automations, you're not offended by text.

I think as things evolve, more things are headed in a text direction. That doesn't mean that email marketing is dead whatsoever, but text gives you a more instant access for appointment or meeting reminders, things that are more critical versus a countdown email, so to speak. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. And adding those touch points up, I think what it would do for a bride or groom is just make them feel good, [00:25:00] 

Kristina Stubblefield: a little more comfortable, 

Brittany Murphy: a little more comfortable. So if you feel good and comfortable, you're more likely to refer the things that are making you feel good and comfortable because you want to share that happiness with someone else. 

Kristina Stubblefield: And even if you don't get a referral out of it, that's not why I'm saying doing it. Yeah. You're establishing a stronger relationship with that client.

And after the day is over and you're the couple's married, Maybe they will refer you then if you're more like

Brittany Murphy: yeah. And you're more likely to get a review. You made us feel good the entire time. 

Kristina Stubblefield: A review you've completed the project and you've left everyone feeling warm and fuzzy. Yep. That makes me think of followups, but I know we're not there yet.

So I'm sure you probably have that on your list because I think that's something that when the event, the day of the event. To me, there's so many opportunities there to really seal that event, that contract and leave on just outstanding terms. But anyway, so we talked about, automation follow ups. We really were talking about [00:26:00] communication along the process.

Where does that take us? I know you were jotting a couple of things down. 

Brittany Murphy: Really, that's the beginning until we get to, the day of, and then follow up after day of. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Okay, so let's talk about day of. Are there things that stood out in your mind from the business standpoint? At the day of, we're obviously past the marketing side of it.

But we're still solidly in the relationship. I still say relationship marketing. We're still in that side of it. So talk to me about the day of. 

Brittany Murphy: Well, I guess I'll give the backstory of what happened during the day. It just kind of helped put our things into perspective. So I had an amazing wedding.

Unfortunately, Brittany caught either a stomach bug or heat exhaustion or something because I threw up more times that day than I would like to count and or admit to. So I was very sick. Most of the day. Unfortunately my husband did not know I was that sick until we had our first look and afterwards I told him that I [00:27:00] was not feeling very well and he was held my hair the rest of the night.

He was awesome. So on that, what I joke about is the other person I spent the most time with on my day other than my husband was a trash can. 

Kristina Stubblefield: And I was shocked when you shared this because your pictures. Nothing gave any impression whatsoever. Even pictures, cause we're friends on Facebook, even pictures that other people had posted, like I had no way of knowing when you told me this, I was completely shocked.

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. So I think my adrenals were so high. It's what kind of like just pulled me through the day. It felt like I had the flu on top of like science. I feel like I had three different sicknesses 

Kristina Stubblefield: on top of it being the biggest day of your life. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. Just the stress of that, I know fed into it.

Kristina Stubblefield: But I'm glad you shared that because Goodness, this is what brings it to the surface about professional vendors, in my opinion. 

Brittany Murphy: Absolutely. So this is all to say, I wasn't very present to help take [00:28:00] care of the day as much as I thought I would have been. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Makes that DOC. 

Brittany Murphy: Made that DOC clutch. Very much so. So luckily in all of this crisis happening, yes, luckily I was able to pull together by the time we were, we did run late for the ceremony. I was sitting there ready for the first time in my life. I wasn't going to be late, but I unfortunately was late because I was not feeling too well, was able to pull it together, have the ceremony, take pictures afterwards, after those pictures, while everybody was enjoying cocktail hour, unfortunately, my adrenals wore back down again and I started to feel sick all over again.

So had to get completely ripped out of my dress pretty quickly. Cause I was just not doing well during all of this. All of my vendors had to take care of themselves and take care of the wedding without being able to ask me almost anything. Cause I was almost completely unavailable. 

Kristina Stubblefield: The event went on.

Brittany Murphy: Without me,

Kristina Stubblefield: without you, whether you were in the room or not, there was still an event happening. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes. Which it had to be. We were having friends and family from all over the world, like people flying in from Hungary to come show [00:29:00] their love and support for our wedding. So it had to go on and the whole.

The funny enough concept we had told every vendor, which again, communication from your brides and grooms, it's very important as well. It's why you have to ask them these questions and not just tout about yourself is I had told almost every vendor how I want this day to go. And the goal is it doesn't feel like a wedding.

This is a big party with a ceremony at the beginning of it, so that's why I didn't want to do the garter toss. I didn't want to do the, the flower toss. All my friends are married. Like let's not waste time with that. We did toast at our rehearsal dinner. I didn't want to stop the idea of a party going on with all of our friends and family being there.

And unfortunately some of his relatives from Hungary do not speak English. So why would we waste 30 minutes on something they're not going to enjoy when they're our guests of honor. In my sense, they traveled a great deal to get here. 

Kristina Stubblefield: To share with you on your special day. Yes, absolutely. 

Brittany Murphy: So luckily knowing myself and over communicating on my end It really helped where all the vendors picked up pieces my day of coordinator in the very beginning.

So I ran late [00:30:00] even getting there we were all supposed to be there. I came almost two hours late I was not good and even my husband was not calling me because I think he was just like maybe she's just taking her time Like let's leave her alone. Like it's her day. Let her you know, she just wants to take an hour extra in the shower. It's her day, she can do it. Type of mentality. 

Kristina Stubblefield: But in all honesty, you were so sick, you literally couldn't drive there. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes. So I was waiting, yeah, waiting to drive and everyone had already left. I was the last one. 

Kristina Stubblefield: And this is stuff that you can't plan for. We talk about all of these things that you can plan for, but this wasn't, you weren't out binge drinking the night before, the week before.

Like this is something that can happen that you're not going to know ahead of time. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. The only thing I knew of ahead of time was I actually, I had one glass of wine, a rehearsal dinner. And unfortunately that night was the first time I threw up. And so it snowballed from there. And even he was like, What happened?

I was like, I don't know. Hopefully it has got the bad spirits out of my body, whatever it was. So the joke we make is it was Murphy's law hitting me one last time before I could [00:31:00] become part of his family. What that means though, I was already running late. So my DOC took charge, was able, I did a good job organizing decorations.

I decided to take that on myself. I really wanted a look that I didn't want to pay the huge price tag for and I'm a creative hands on craft person so I wanted to embrace. Yes, it was part of, I wanted to be a part of the wedding day. So when people said, oh my god, it's so pretty, I could say, thanks.

Me and the help of this family and friends were able to make this happen and everybody was amazed. Part of our wedding gift actually for everybody was, they're able to take all the flowers home. And I had centerpieces that were a living arrangement that they could take as well. So we didn't have too much of a cleanup at the end as much as the beginning, but the DOC was able to step up, take charge of that.

I had meetings with hair and makeup, so they had already started. We had a schedule of events. So everything luckily was running very well without me. Which was amazing because I only had like my mom text me once, mom's always text you every hour on the hour, what you're doing only text me once saying, are you on your way?

And luckily I had finally left the house. I was, but I even had to [00:32:00] make a pit stop on the way to the wedding venue. I was really just pulling myself out as the head coordinator. 

Kristina Stubblefield: To say you were sick is a complete understatement. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. I was probably having an exorcism moment is what it felt like. Everything out of my body wanted to come out. So 

Kristina Stubblefield: if this would not have been your wedding date, you probably wouldn't have been out of bed. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes, I would have 

Kristina Stubblefield: unfortunately, 

Brittany Murphy: absolutely. Yeah, so I had to pull it together on that side of things, but that's where, yes, the communication and the good vetting of vendors on my behalf, really what pulled it all together where I wasn't as stressed out.

Luckily, it helped calm me down. But that wasn't going to solve the sickness aspect of it. 

Kristina Stubblefield: So something there is, I feel like that is something that is really not talked enough about because when you talk about experience, that's just not experience of taking amazing photos or amazing video, the experience means there's been.

Situations happen during a ceremony, during a reception, leading up to it, it's called life. However, handling [00:33:00] it, knowing what to do, how to adjust. And we've jokingly said on the other podcast about frienders. If you want someone to be your friend after the wedding day, don't put them in charge and or hire them to do something.

The other side of that is if it's something that they haven't been a part of. And been in situations, it's very, can be stressful. There are things executed at certain times. And if you have something happen, God forbid someone has, a vendor breaks down, is involved in an accident, most of them are traveling places.

I've always said to people, it's not if something is gonna happen at a wedding, it's what, why? You got multiple parties involved, multiple people. And then it's the professionalism, in my opinion, and the experience is what allows things to be adjusted, pivoted, and flow smoothly for your guests to still have a great experience [00:34:00] and as few people know as possible.

And that's one of the things when I knew how much you would put into finding the right vendors for you and your fiancee at the time. This, until the day of, and until after the event. It's hard to fully see how all that's going to come together. But in my opinion, this is an example of great vendors pulling together.

And you have not disclosed to me, I don't know who the vendors are. It's great vendors pulling together for one mission. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes. 

Kristina Stubblefield: And that was your wedding day and your vision. And I'm happy to hear that's what went on. I hate that you weren't able to be fully a part of it, but I'm glad that they embraced you and your guests to carry out what you wanted.

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. I think a skill we don't talk about a lot, but just having that little aspect of problem solving. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Oh, was that what I was alluding to? 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Yeah. Problem solving. 

Brittany Murphy: Problem solving for your client. The reason I hired [00:35:00] you is because you're the professional. You have the experience. I do not.

Kristina Stubblefield: You mean you don't need to be back there putting some records on. Oh wait, that shows age. No eight tracks. No. Right. No, with not even CDs anymore. 

Brittany Murphy: No. Yeah. 

Kristina Stubblefield: It's amazing how just that little part. With DJs has my goodness in the years. But anyway, you're right. You hired them to, for their expertise to handle that part of it.

Brittany Murphy: Yes, giving that problem solving to your clients, even if there's not problems along the way to start saying, okay, we already took care of this and this. I didn't think I would be so stressed out. I made the joke that I've done presentations in front of crowds way bigger than the population I had at my wedding.

Like this should not be a scary event where I read my vows to the person I love, like in front of people who've known me most of my life, like this is not scary to me presenting in front of strangers who are judging me 100%. Yes, I get a lot more stage fright for that. So I was like, I don't want this fear, I don't want to have it. Knowing you're already going to have it, you already have that stress, the vendors coming with [00:36:00] problem solving and just over communication on the day of was exactly what I needed. So quick example of being my photographer and videography team. After when it was starting, after I was, 

Kristina Stubblefield: because there was big adjustments, I'm sure they are.

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. So the photographer and videographer, that whole company, they knew I was going downhill. They were actively sitting where, okay, he was doing, he's doing his first look over here, with his pictures, I'm going to stay inside in the cool to try to find some ways to work without getting us in the heat 

Kristina Stubblefield: as long as you can, 

Brittany Murphy: as much as we could, they really worked with it. So one thing they always did when they would walk in and see me and unfortunately the times I would walk in is I'm head in the bucket and they're like, Hey, pretty lady. So what we're going to do right now is we're going to take some pictures of people dancing outside. We're going to get some good family shots and friend shots, all the things you talked about, you wanted to show who's here and get good pictures of the people who love to came and support you.

And I'm like. Thank you so much. It brought me back to life. I was like, thank you because 

Kristina Stubblefield: it's a peace of mind. Even though you were in that instance, you knew you was still getting taken care of. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes. And every [00:37:00] vendor knows the bride's going to worry about the bride, the grooms.

They're going to worry about themselves and quite opposite happens where maybe the bride and groom over drink throughout the night and things do go downhill. But usually that's a lot later when lights go down and vendors are trying to wrap up. So it's not a concern. Mine was before any festivities even started.

So giving that over communication of, Hey, since we can't do this right now, I'm going to pivot and do this instead. So we can still say somewhat on time, we're still going to achieve everything you wanted to, it just might be a little bit shorter. And just that calmness and over communication was, okay, things aren't going my way.

That's okay. I'm still gonna have my first look with him. I'm still gonna be able to see him. And we did a surprise look. One of his best friends put on my grandmother's wedding dress. And actually did the first look with him because I could see from the window how nervous he was. And he's more of an introvert loud talking extrovert.

So I was like, you know what, I preplanned that and they were able to hide me in a room with air conditioning so I could stay okay. And I got to watch that moment and watch him relieve all of his stress too. So by the time I got out there, it was a [00:38:00] lot fun. And after we had done our first look, then I admitted to him, yeah, it took the edge off of him.

And then I admitted to him, I said, I'm glad you're feeling better. Just so you know, if I say something to you or I need to run, like I haven't been doing well. And he was like, Oh my God, I didn't know this, and just really made sure that I was doing well, but even the photographer knew this the entire time asked, do we need to stop? Do you need water? Really,

Kristina Stubblefield: but also didn't run to him and say, Oh my gosh, your fiance is so sick. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes. Not to freak out the other half of the party. Yeah. Everybody knew except the groom side, luckily, and they were all able to keep it very professional, very, I'll stop saying this word because we could take a shot for every time I say it and we'd be drunk by this point, but the communication of what's going on, so therefore, since I couldn't physically see it, couldn't be there for all of it, to know, okay, you're still doing you're still doing my mom and my dad's pictures.

Okay, good. Our parents are still doing that side of it. We're still getting the things we want. Okay. Okay. Cool. Thank you for running this versus me having to be like, okay, do we do this? Do we do this? Do we do this? Like just that sense of calm allowed me to say, okay All I need to focus on right now [00:39:00] is drinking some water eating some crackers breathing trying to calm down Just enough to get out there because unfortunately we didn't get out to our first dance until, a few people had left, unfortunately.

So it was right about 8 o'clock, 8. 30 timeframe when we got back out there to do that side of it. 

Kristina Stubblefield: You just had to do the best that you could, but to still do anything you could to be present when you could. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes. And the last compliment I'll give is even just photographer and biographer team went above and beyond.

Getting ready to say Hey, like we're hitting our timeframe for the day. And I was finally started to feel better. I was like, Hey if you're willing to, I want to do our first dance. I would really love to record this. We worked on it. It's important to us. I'd love to see our family's reactions to it.

And it's this is the first thing we're doing other than him holding my hair back. I'd like to get this on a film. And they were like, hell yes, girl. She's alive, you know, I mean, set everything up, did it like stayed to make sure we got a few pictures. Cause we had a neon sign. I said, we didn't get a picture in front of this yet.

Can we get a picture? I'm like, Oh my God, girl. So all the things you need. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Accommodating 

Brittany Murphy: Yes. So when I was finally able [00:40:00] to pull through them also changing their schedule to expedite, to finish it, because the thing is, as we talked about before this podcast started photography and videography takes a long time to get back.

There's a lot of post production work that goes into it. I hope when he sends me everything, he does send me his review link because I would love to review just the day of how amazing it was. He did record a video testimonial because he's a smart business owner. He already had a video camera there to know to, Hey, ask us questions and do it.

I don't know if we presented as well on video at that point because we were exhausted. I was sick. I had no food in my system, anything he would ask me now, like I'm obviously in full health. I would love to continue to rave about how above and beyond they went and also how good they made me feel.

Cause I'm a little bit of a tomboy at heart. Even though I was dressed up very fancy and I'm just still talking to me, like I'm one of the dudes, like I'm here, like you good girl, like, all right, let's do this. Just not okay, princess are you sure you want to walk outside?

That wouldn't have done well with me that it made me feel a bit more babied and made me more worried that I was sick potentially. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Their attitude.

Brittany Murphy: It was very friendly. 

Kristina Stubblefield: You could tell they were [00:41:00] there for you, but they were still doing their job. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes. Yes. And I think that's all part. If you ask enough questions, get to know your bride or groom, like they knew to talk to me like that. I joke, I cuss a shit ton. My dad is a sailor when it comes to cuss words. So like even the sales process, I'm like, Oh, sorry. That's just me, and I'll be honest. If a cuss word drops in our video I'm not going to scream as long as it's part of the F bomb.

My parents don't want to hear that. I was like, but that's me. That's who I am. And so like them talking me back on that was like, okay. Okay. You're not making me feel anything else other than just comfortable. I'm in my skin. I'm doing okay. Girl, you got this, do this. 

Kristina Stubblefield: They didn't treat you differently, so to speak, because it was your wedding day.

And because you were so sick, they still talk to you like the person you are as Brittany. 

Brittany Murphy: Absolutely. And I think that's what helped me mentally get through it as well. Vendors really picking up and knowing that aspect of it, I think was amazing. 

Kristina Stubblefield: The communication, I know it feels like we've harped on that, but there should be a big takeaway from that, how incredibly important it is from before the sales process begins, before you ever know, [00:42:00] someone's looking you up all the way to after the event.

I still sit here and gosh I'm so sorry that you had to go through that on your wedding day, but on the other hand, I'm so thankful that you had such a team that executed what you wanted and I'm so glad you were able to do the small parts of it that you were because I know you, you worked on this event and I say worked on it.

It was work for over a year. But you can only control so many things. Like we can't control the weather as much as everyone wants to. 

Brittany Murphy: And that was the thing I was worried about the most and it was beautiful 

Kristina Stubblefield: and you cannot control getting sick, honestly, it stinks that it lasted the entire day, but you've made it through it.

Brittany Murphy: And I think in hindsight, I'm so glad that we had those three episodes to really hone in on the things that were making me angry during the sales process of it, because all I can look back now is say, I'm so glad I did that due diligence. I'm so [00:43:00] glad I jumped through the hoops to actually go through the interviews, talk to people.

Hey, what's your style like, how do you do this process? Where are you going to be on the wedding day? Because I want to share this day with you, obviously, like, how is this going to work out and doing all of that to have it work out the way it did. That's why things turned out.

Yes. It was Murphy's Law trying to attack me one last, it was the last thing it could get on me. Everything else was perfect. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Sure. 

Brittany Murphy: And I had a positive attitude going into everything and unfortunately the only thing positive, not positive, was how my health was on that day. But I mean if you think about it, if I had not done that and just You know, maybe went okay to everybody that gave it to me.

Cause it was a lot of work and I didn't want to do it. I might not have had the best experience. So it's where I'm glad I did it, but please go back to those episodes and do all the things we bitched about you need to do, because you might be an amazing vendor and you would have been the person I needed you for that day.

But if you didn't have any information about yourself, any resources on how you provided work in the past, any client examples, client testimonials, like any of those things for me to go off of, it made it [00:44:00] harder. I'm glad I did it. So if you know that brides are only so more thankful that they had the right vendors on the day of, then make sure you have the information to show them you are the right vendor to get that business in the first place. Cause I'm sure. I could have picked some other people and they would have done just as fabulous of a job. There is a million amazing vendors out there. It's not just the five I picked that day. There's a million amazing businesses, but those amazing businesses did not do a good job marketing themselves or maybe set up the sales process to get to be that person I ended up picking.

Kristina Stubblefield: At the time they did not make themselves appear or show up in a way to be considered. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. And very simple things that... 

Kristina Stubblefield: And some of which you never had a conversation with. It was based on what was online, on their website, on their social media.

We covered all of that in the previous episodes. But I think a lot of times people go off the... All I got to do is set up a meeting and get them face to face. If they don't take the step to do that. Yeah. And a lot of people as things evolve, a lot of engaged couples [00:45:00] are not this face to face type person, and that should be okay. That. They don't want to initially start here. They want to do their research online, look at what's there, and then take the next step. 

Brittany Murphy: Absolutely. And I feel that's part of the sales process. I'm sure most wedding vendors do not like, I don't like it either completely. When I know people are shopping right now to get pricing and get proposals together, it's not fun to be on the receiving side of it.

As we said. Growth markers. We know that when you get a proposal from us, you've already got it from one person, if not two, at least we're used to it. It's not fun, but it's part of sales is you have to obviously make yourself shine. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Put your best foot forward each time. 

Brittany Murphy: Outshine your competitors and go through that side of it.

So knowing that they're not always doing that side of it, it just, it makes it 10 times harder. While I was doing that window shopping, there were some people pressing. Well, let's just have the video call. So how my process went and maybe this helps shed some light on whether brides and grooms are doing is yes, I [00:46:00] reached out to maybe three to five a piece for each vendor category because prices, huge ranges, and also huge range of how far out they're booked.

So I can reach out to five and only three reach out to me. And two of those say they're already booked. So I really only have one person at five who's able to work with me. Okay. So knowing that I was going through that to get an Excel spreadsheet together. Hey, what do prices look like from people I like when I put that into Excel spreadsheet, am I hitting my budget? Oh, okay. This category is way over. I need to go back to the drawing board for it. I knew people don't like getting that, but what I was trying to do is get enough information, get a few enough proposals for each. And then once I had two DJs, two photographers, two vendors for meals and alcohol, I would then do the video call with those people I liked enough.

So that's where most of them might not want to jump into that just yet. They might be doing this backward research, which is why it's even more crucial if, okay, here's my proposal, follow up. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Wait, that other F word, wait, follow up, 

Brittany Murphy: follow up. I know I wanted to say the other F word with it, but just the follow up side of it.

So I know it might be [00:47:00] frustrating, but that's what we have to do. We have a meeting, here's a proposal. I put on my calendar. Hey, do you mind if I reach back out to you in seven days? Nope. Sounds great. Well, I just got your permission to again, reach back out to you. Hey, what do you think about proposal?

Kristina Stubblefield: And that's on your calendar, right? 

Brittany Murphy: It's on my calendar. I added it. I could almost automate it if I want to, but I do very much personalize those emails, but I have an automated reminder that says, Hey, email ABC company about your proposal. Yes. So even though you don't enjoy them, maybe doing that, you do want to eventually get them to that video call.

You can still get them to that video call, but you need to actually have that follow up process with them versus really just being that stringent only. We have this video call and then I give you a proposal or nothing. Right. So I did see there is the gambit of. Sales processes that vendors want to have and you have all right to make it what you want.

But again, I think what we talked about those last episodes was take a step back out, pretend that you are in your twenties or thirties and you're getting married and you're looking out at this, how you make your clients walk through that process. Would you actually want to go through that process [00:48:00] yourself?

Kristina Stubblefield: And that's why I've leaned my head down like I have if you're watching this on video, because I feel like I harp on this a lot with wedding professionals, and I really believe that a lot of them work out of their email inbox, and I'm going to admit, been there, I get it, but when you're dealing with multiple projects, multiple events, but also inquiries coming in on future ones.

So you could be juggling a two year timeframe here. A lot of times that is the case for wedding professionals. You are doing a disservice to yourself by not having some kind of system. An all in one system that helps you with tracking the liens. When did they inquire? When did you last follow up? And that's not even having the step of automation.

It's there to help you, but being able to glance and know, I haven't heard from these people in two weeks. Maybe I [00:49:00] should follow up. Did they get my email? It's there in front of your face. And when you work out of your email inbox, it's not there. And there's apps, there's Boomerang. I'm a big fan of Boomerang where you can click and add that email follow up to your calendar.

There's a lot of software and tools there, but if you don't use them, wait, first, if you don't implement it correctly and you don't use it on a regular basis, it can't do what it sets out to do. It's just something that you've purchased. You've got it, but you don't use it. And honestly, when I have conversations with people and they're like I didn't think anything about working out of my email inbox.

I'm here to tell you emails get lost in the shuffle, the sense of time, even for me, I think two days have gone by and seven days have went by. And that's the thing is you're really doing a disservice to not only yourself, your business, your potential clients and your existing clients, because you're making it harder on yourself to juggle.

And [00:50:00] that's what it is. It's a juggling act when you're doing projects, especially across a big timeframe. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes. Yeah. And again, you want to cater to the client in the end. 

Kristina Stubblefield: And to the leads because they need to really be showcased. Oh, this is how you communicate this. Oh, you do send follow ups.

Brittany Murphy: Oh my god. You mean I could get a perspective about you before I actually choose to work with you and know who you are. 

Kristina Stubblefield: We could talk an hour. Honestly, on follow ups, and that is something to me that people don't realize the importance of that, that a person feels, Oh, they do care. Oh, I am, I'm not just a number.

Oh, wow. They, this is my date is in this email. Yes. There's so many ways to personalize it. It could still be automated. But the meaning of that follow up, although you can think, Oh gosh, it takes so much time away for me, or how am I supposed to follow up with 10 people? There are [00:51:00] systems, processes, automations to make that so much easier.

And I know we're harping on this, but it really is that important. 

Brittany Murphy: Well, cause there's no excuses now. There are, as we said, there's programs do this for you. And if, even if you put into an Excel sheet and track it yourself, like you would actually probably have better numbers. Then if you don't do that, but again, put this into a system and kind of do it, I'd like to summarize and end cap this with two examples real quick.

So the DJ category, I think I talked a lot about that. I think I emailed like over 20 DJs. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Yes. 

Brittany Murphy: I only heard back from maybe half of them, half of those that responded back were already booked. And so I was only able to talk to two, three guys when I actually interviewed. So like up 20 emails, I got down to 10%, 15%.

Conversion on actually talking to someone in a meeting. So what the example I want to give is one of the people who I think did the best job at communicating during the sales process and one who I think did the worst job. So best job, let's start with the really good. So I met them at a wedding show.

They got all my information. They [00:52:00] actually contacted me almost every 30 days, whether that was via text, via phone call. And if they do as a phone call, it was a personalized message saying, Hey, Brittany, just following up on your wedding for June 3rd, you picked a DJ yet, call me back, as soon as you get this, if you'd like, if you have any questions and you want to talk about it.

And I actually talked to him a few times. I didn't get the feeling I wanted from them for some reason, but they did an amazing job following up. If I had not found someone, they would have gotten the business just because they followed up. That's what I'm trying to say. I was not sold. 100%, but they did such a good job.

I was like, you know what? It made an impression and made an impression. I was like, if they're doing this good, a job falling up now, hopefully that would mean the day of they would do just a good job of as I said, ended up knocking the business. Actually, a family friend had a friend who owned a DJ business and I was able to watch their work and it was exactly the work I had wanted.

The party vibe was what I was going for. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Interesting. You watched their work. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. And they didn't have much of it. So again, you need to collect an ad and the DJ ended up using did a good job afterwards saying, Hey. If any of the video footage you get afterwards or photos includes me at all, would you please send them my way?

[00:53:00] And I said, Oh, hell yeah. Why not? I'm a marketer. I get what you're trying to do with it. Kudos for you for asking me to do that. So thank you. 

Kristina Stubblefield: But it was so important in your decision that why not help people in the future. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes, it's what I look for. So yes, I want to provide him back because he did an amazing job for my wedding.

The opposite end of things, a DJ I did not pick. They were actually the one that had a video call with me in the beginning, which I appreciated, but they were the ones who I had the line dance conversation with, did not fully listen. And then, you heard that the beginning episode, how that went. I got one follow up from them, right the day after that call, saying, Hey, any questions?

And I basically wrote back I'm interviewing DJs right now. I'll let you know if we choose you basically. And heard nothing until 10 or five days before the wedding. I get an email from the said DJ saying, Hey, I need to get your data. You need to fill that spreadsheet for all the songs you want for your wedding.

I was like, bruh. We haven't talked in six months. I've not signed any contract with you. What the fuck? Why would you think I'm [00:54:00] using you? I wrote a nice email back saying, thank you, but we actually chose to go with another DJ. Thanks for reaching out. Like I just was nice about it and left it out.

Kristina Stubblefield: Did you get anything back? 

Brittany Murphy: No, no response from that. And I was like, okay, so if this is a sales strategy, anyone's using, listening to this, please don't do this. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Assuming that you're moving forward without a contract. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes. Assuming you are the fit without any communication in the meantime of it. Very odd. And that's where again, had they done better communication.

And in the meantime, they might've been someone I would chose to. I liked them better than the one that did good follow up, even though they didn't listen to me fully. After they realized their boo boo, they did say, I'm so sorry. You did mention you don't like those. We'll figure out a different game plan for you then.

I was like, okay, I don't need you to tell me what the game plan would be this very second, but I need you to know as a expert in your field, make a strategy for me. I'm a bride. I'm not going to go out there and DJ unless you're going to teach me in the next 30 days to do this. So it's your role.

Kristina Stubblefield: You don't want to take on something else. 

Brittany Murphy: I can't. I'm in the bathroom throwing up or I'm at the trash can with my husband throwing up. So I need you to teach me. So yeah, just those [00:55:00] two very end perspectives on it. I know neither of them got the business, but I want you to more focus on the guy that did good follow up would have gone the business had I not found the family friend who I was able to see a video of and really.

Even

Kristina Stubblefield: though you didn't feel like it was a hundred percent fit because of these other things that were important to you about the follow ups, checking in, that would have solidified it for you. Such an interesting perspective. And I'm glad you gave both examples, even though you didn't go with them. Both left an impression, not a good one, and a really good one.

And I would think in the future, if someone come to you, that's probably going to stand out in your mind if there was somebody looking for a DJ, whether it be for a wedding, a corporate event or anything that we're right back into relationship marketing, because maybe you didn't get that event, but because you did such a good job and follow up, you might not have been a good fit for what you were doing. But could be referred in the future. 

Brittany Murphy: Absolutely. They had an app, the DJ that did a good follow up one day actually did answer the phone call because I knew it was their number. Because [00:56:00] again, they called me every month. I memorized at that point. I don't like sales calls all the time. So one time I didn't answer because it was after work. They called at 5:30, I'm off work. I was in my backyard. I was like watching my dogs play answered it. And I had a little bit of a stressful day. And so I was like, you know what, let me just ask you all the questions again now. Cause at that point I was like, maybe I'm just going to choose you. And so given you are doing all the right things, you're making me feel good.

Yes. When I watched their work, I didn't like the way they did it, but. Everything given, let's just put it the other way, if you had a bride who liked the way you do things, they would have got the business from the first two calls, probably. They liked your work, you did a good follow up bing, bang, boom, you got it.

They continued on the path to do it, but I was honest with them, I still had not selected my DJ so they knew in their head, we still have an opportunity. We said, there's still a chance. 

Kristina Stubblefield: There's still a chance. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes. And so I just doing that aspect of it. We're in sales as well. So we know we have to continue that follow up.

And even if we don't get the business, with my industry and yours as well, we can say, can I follow up with you later? Given in weddings, most likely we don't get the business that wedding's going to happen in a [00:57:00] timeframe. You're not going to get it afterwards. If any of them, honestly, just food for thought, if any of them who didn't get the business when I emailed back saying, so sorry, we chose to go with someone else, I would have loved this just me as a marketer. What if they emailed back saying, thank you so much for the update. Do you mind if I ask why we weren't a good fit for you or what made us lose your business? Any of those phrases to say, what could we have done better to have earned you would have given feedback.

I absolutely would have given all of them feedback. If any of them would ask point blank, I would have given them honest feedback. Hey, to be honest man you didn't listen to me at all when I said I don't like line dances. And if you're not going to listen to me on the very first phone call introduction, I'm just worried you won't listen to me on the day of because you're going to be more worried about how you show off to yourself versus how I want you to run my day.

Kristina Stubblefield: So two F words there. Follow up and feedback. There's nothing wrong with asking for feedback and I would encourage you to do it in a nice way. Thank you very much for letting us know. We appreciate the time that we've gotten to talk with you. Wish you nothing but the best. If you would like to give us any feedback, we'd love to hear so we can use it in the future. 

Brittany Murphy: [00:58:00] Absolutely. It doesn't have to be a big, long drawn out thing. No. And I use this for my marketing and I get answers that are everywhere and sometimes I don't get an answer back at all. That's just how the process is going to work, but I can't make changes off things that I'm not getting the answers for. So it's only in your best interest to do that. And that, if that follows through after the event and that's where it all comes together, where that's the other half of not that my complaints come in, but something I'm just going to go and throw out there to switch subjects a little bit.

Only my day of coordinator is the only person to have asked me for a review following my wedding. 

Kristina Stubblefield: In eight weeks, other than the photographer did a little video at the... The day they ask, you did a video, a testimonial. 

Brittany Murphy: Yes, I did do a day of... 

Kristina Stubblefield: Right, but under the circumstances. Like you had said, you would much rather do a written or something for them down the road. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. Just in case I looked like shit. 

Kristina Stubblefield: The only other one has been the day of coordinator. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. And she sent it. So given, if you know your clients, you know what they're doing. If any of them had asked me, my DOC knew we're not flying [00:59:00] out immediately after the wedding for the honeymoon.

Like his family's here at a country. We're going to stay here, hanging with them. We're doing the honeymoon three months down the road in September. So I'm not going anywhere, and we're just. Pack all the stuff in my car. It's just going to be parked in the garage and we'll move it out as needed.

So she knew she could follow up Sunday, Monday. I think she did it like Monday. So she gave me like Sunday to decompress. 

Kristina Stubblefield: What an opportunity though to check in, hey, I know you were so sick on your wedding day and I'm not saying she did this, but for other vendors, I know you were so sick. I hope you are feeling better.

We loved being a part of your day. Your guests were amazing if you're not feeling up to it, understand, but when you do, here's the link to write a review. There was a perfect segue and it sucks that it was on a bad situation, so to speak, or not the best situation, but there was a perfect followup opportunity. And to also say, Hey, when you are feeling better, here's the link. 

Brittany Murphy: Absolutely. So for example, the bartending company knew I was sick. Someone had said something to them because I think they were asking like, Hey, we've made special drinks for [01:00:00] the bride and groom. And I think it was the DOC or someone just said Oh she's not doing well.

And so they actually packed up. Packages of drinks for us and put them in the fridge. So when they were cleaning up and I was finally back out there with my husband, they were like, Hey, please don't leave before you check the fridge. We put some to go drinks for you. So you did not have anything. And I was like, Oh my God, how nice of you all. That's so sweet. 

Kristina Stubblefield: It was a small touch that made a big difference. 

Brittany Murphy: Small touch 

Kristina Stubblefield: You couldn't drink it, of course. Couldn't drink it. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. The only thing I ate that day was the piece of cake that my husband fed me. So it was a very humbling day of, the only thing I needed substance for was the food he was giving me. And actually, his mom made a very traditional Hungarian cake, so it was absolutely delicious. But straight sugar under his stomach was not so bueno, but the thing I wish I would've seen after that and some of you, some inventors might have this. It was a different team that was there serving that day than who I had talked to planning it out. Absolutely fine. As long as that team there knows what the plan is, great. 

Now, did that team correlate to the owner? Hey, the bride was sick. We made her some, we left some drinks [01:01:00] pre packaged for them to take home. Even just the owner asking, how did the event go? Getting a five minute set, subject of what happened to say, okay, now they can follow up with the review. They might not have been there to know, but they could say, Hey, Brittany, Tom told us how sick you were. I hope you had a chance to enjoy the drinks we made for you. So sorry you didn't get to enjoy them. We hope your friends and family did. If you get a chance to leave us a review on how we perform that day, we'd greatly appreciate it when you're feeling better. Hands over fist, I would, Given, please listen to this, I will still give a review. You still did business for me, I'm still willing to do it.

I know some people are told, wait months down the road until after they're back on their honeymoon. Ask the client what they're doing. Some are going immediately afterwards, some are not going. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Just in conversation, it doesn't have to be on a questionnaire. 

Brittany Murphy: Oh yeah, no. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Are you all taking a honeymoon? And don't assume that people are. Some people are doing honeymoons now. 

Are you all going out of town together? Are you doing a honeymoon? Or when are you doing that? Mental notes, and that's, I think so many times when people hear the word follow up, it's automatically assumed for a lead automatically assumed for a client.

A followup can also be after the event feedback [01:02:00] can be, if you didn't get the business, if you did get the business and what you're saying right here, right now people are missing the opportunity to get feedback and reviews that can do nothing. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. 

Kristina Stubblefield: And help their business. 

Brittany Murphy: And what's your opinion on this? As far as wedding vendors, what's the time frame they should ask for that review? Knowing some brides and grooms do immediately leave for a week afterwards and don't want to be thinking about their wedding potentially. 

Kristina Stubblefield: If someone has asked my opinion, I have said, two or three days later I could see sending it was so great to be part of your event. Hope you have a great honeymoon. If you know they're going on their honeymoon. And I normally say like that 10 day range. That seven to 10 day range. If you're requesting a review or testimonial. If you know that they're not going somewhere or they're not going somewhere for a while, I would then change to say two to three days, do your followup, thanking them for having you be part of their special day, cause you really were part of a major event for that couple and families [01:03:00] and then to say, this is the next step. And it depends on who they are because if it's a photographer, videographer, you're going to be hearing whatever their timeline is, you're going to be hearing from them.

So it really depends on are they done, so to speak a bartending service, a DJ, a bakery for the cake or catering. That would be my take is I think the next day, soon in your situation, if I was consulting those vendors, I would have said 24 hours would have been more than plenty given the circumstances to follow up like, truly, thank you for letting us work with you. How are you? I hope you're feeling better. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah.

Kristina Stubblefield: I think you have to look at who you are in the business as far as what category you are, how do you work with the couple, and then the time frame after. Are they traveling? Are they not? Nowadays it seems like a lot of people aren't leaving the next morning.

It is a couple days before they fly out. And or some people aren't doing honeymoons. So I think [01:04:00] listening to know, and then getting that in your notes when it's best for that followup, but the key is even if it's 15 days later, or you make a decision as a company, we're going to wait 30 days, follow up, follow up, ask for a review and ask for feedback.

Brittany Murphy: Yeah. And that's why I think I wanted to mention not every person I was talking to in the sales process was actually the person there, the day performing the task. So if that's the business you fall in, where you have people who. You have, you're a food vendor, but you have people who work for you to bring the food out, prepare the food.

And you're not physically there. You're more of the in house ask those guys, how did it go? And then that's what your follow up needs to reflect. The fact that the the food caterer came up to us and, was like, thanks for having us here. Hope you enjoy the food.

And my husband was like, it was delicious. And I was like, thank you. I was like, I've only received compliments. So thank you for doing such a good job of the food. I wish I could have enjoyed it. But I've made everybody else happy with choosing you. So this is a win for us still. Why the heck haven't they asked me for a review?

Especially like when you're that, when the team there can relay that [01:05:00] back to the office, or even if you are the team, in the day of, if they're happy with you or not, you could probably read most brides faces if they're like, yeah, you did great. 

Kristina Stubblefield: But you're also excited to give the reviews.

Brittany Murphy: Yeah.

Kristina Stubblefield: I can even see you without being prompted going and doing some of these reviews. But I hear from you saying Hey, send me, where do you want this? Where could it best help you? Where would you like me to put this? That's what I hear you saying. Not that you won't go and do one on your own, but you're really waiting for that company to say, thank you for letting us be a part of your day. Here's what I would like. Here's where I'd like the review to go, or here's a link. 

Brittany Murphy: Yeah, and that's the whole part of it. So my DOC gave me the links to WeddingWire and The Knot. So that was the two places she wanted her review. And I said, okay. And I said, do you mind if I copy and paste if it's gonna be the same on both?

She said, absolutely fine. But directly, I could click from the text message and then I copy and paste. I did the whole review in five minutes from the message I got saying, yep, no problem. I'm luckily I was sitting down. I was at a good point. I was like, you know what? I'm just gonna knock this out because.

She did do an [01:06:00] amazing job. I only owe it back to her for thanking her to take care of me and take care of everything as much as she did. So yeah, like simplest, simplest place possible. So yes, she did say, hope you're feeling better when you get a chance, could you leave me reviews if you know you liked how I performed and I was like, yeah, no problem girl.

So yes, any type of business though, I still feel that. So my photographer and videographer, as I said, I've not gone back every single thing I've got on the photos. He still could send me a link and I would still probably be willing to send it. Usually most people want to give the review after all the work's done.

And yes, I'm that same person of, I'd like to see it all done in my hands and then rave about you because I can show the rave. I don't want to like, yeah, they're great. They were good. Then it's a made up versus no, they did this, this, this, and this. These are the reasons you should book them.

They still could send it to me right now. And I'd probably be like, yeah, I got 1400 photos. 1400 amazing photos. It's a lot. And I uploaded like 400 to Facebook so I could share with my friends and family didn't get to see it yet. Ask your person because as a wedding vendor, I'm sure you're doing [01:07:00] the best you can't doing the best job for them, make their day as special for them as possible.

So if you're not doing the backing of your own marketing to help get more brides. And I know we've talked about that. 

Kristina Stubblefield: You've done all of this hard work. There's a lot that gets poured into these events by vendors. You want the links, you want to write the reviews. Don't hesitate on asking for them.

Don't hesitate. And is every person going to do it? Probably not. Don't take offense to that. And there's nothing wrong with a followup. Maybe that's 30 days later. Maybe it just wasn't the right timing for them. But do your business and yourself a favor and finish off that event by a thank you email or whatever you want to say.

Some people still do handwritten cards and I'm not knocking that whatsoever. Whatever your system is to actually off board, that's off board a client. Make sure you ask for the reviews. I think that is so important and it can help you going forward. So I know we could talk for [01:08:00] days and I feel like this isn't the end of Brittany coming on here.

Because I would love to get a few more months down the road. Did she get those links? She'll have her pictures and video and. Have more time to be settled in, even though it's been eight weeks, it's only been eight weeks. And, but all of the insights and just having this conversation, I think can help open vendors eyes to hear it straight.

It's not just, it's not coming from me. It's coming straight from the horse's mouth. You've been through this and you're given feedback, not only as a bride at the time, but as a person that wears marketing shoes that you totally get it. Even though you don't work with wedding professionals, you totally understand the online presence and the marketing world.

And at the forefront of that, from all of these times that we've been together, it's communication that each and every person can do. And the stuff that we've talked about. Is [01:09:00] doable items. It's not something that's far fetched that you have to have all this money to invest in. All of the items we talked about can be addressed and can be done in your business.

Brittany Murphy: And they can be done passively as well. You can set this up where you're not even having to lift a finger afterwards. 

Kristina Stubblefield: Yeah. And it's not all to add so many other things to your plate. But just start somewhere, just get started. So thank you so much for sharing all of this. And. This is the perfect recap to go through the other time we sat down, we ended up breaking that out into three parts, but to come back and be able to come full circle, so to speak I think it's been great.

Brittany Murphy: Yes. And now I'm married. 

Kristina Stubblefield: I know she's married. All right. Thank you. I really appreciate it. Thank you, Kristina. There you have it, if you are not already part of the free Facebook group, I encourage you to join WedPro Business Community, and until next time, keep working on your businesses.